I’ve left the family home, now what do I do?
When you’ve left the family (former matrimonial) home, the next step, retrieving your personal belongings, can feel overwhelming, especially when emotions are still raw or safety is a concern.
However, there are steps you can take to recover your items in a way that is calm, legal, and above all, safe for everyone involved.
Make a list and prioritise
Start by making a written list of the belongings you want to collect. Focus on personal items such as:
- Clothing and toiletries
- Sentimental items (photos, heirlooms, gifts)
- Work tools or devices
- Important documents (passports, birth certificates)
- Children’s essentials
Where possible, include photographs or receipts as proof of ownership.
Communicate directly if safe to do so
If there is no history of family violence and it’s safe to do so, you may try to arrange collection through direct communication with your former partner or via your lawyer. Keep the tone calm and respectful. Propose a time when your former partner will not be present or suggest a collection with a family member or trusted person — if that feels safer.
If this feels too difficult or is unsafe, you should ask your lawyer to handle this communication on your behalf.
Always prioritise safety
If there is any risk of harm or family violence, your safety must come first.
In our experience, often the first step for many people is to apply for a Family Violence Intervention Order through the Magistrates’ Court of Victoria. An intervention order may include conditions that allow you or your ex-partner to collect your belongings with police presence or supervision.
If you already have an Intervention Order, check whether it includes provisions about property access (refer to section 86 of the Family Violence Protection Act 2008).
For more information on applying for an order, visit the Intervention Orders page, or contact us directly for personalised advice.
Apply to the Court where necessary
If access to your belongings is denied by your ex-partner, or amicable communication is simply not possible, you can apply to the Federal Circuit and Family Court of Australia for an order allowing you to collect your belongings. The court may:
- Set a date and time for you or a representative to collect items
- Require a support person or police presence
- Prevent either party from contacting the other during collection
These court orders aim to protect both parties while allowing practical matters to be resolved.
To learn more about your options, the Federal Circuit and Family Court of Australia offers helpful brochures and factsheets.
A final word
At Forward, we understand that separation is not just a legal issue, but a sensitive and personal time. Our priority is to help you resolve practical matters with compassion and care, always placing your safety and wellbeing first.
If you’re unsure about how to retrieve your belongings or need legal support to take the next steps, our experienced team is here to help. Our approach is to always manage these communications calmly and respectfully.
